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Posted by / 02-May-2019 23:23

Stuck at validating version wow

Let them go and bring in the Source Healing to this, which allows you to know that you are loved, held and adored beyond measure by all of Existence unconditionally, simply because you exist.Know that if you want to become a better self aesthetically, that is perfectly okay, but rather than trying to punish and admonish yourself into shape, work at this lovingly, supporting and partnering yourself no matter what, throughout the process.Let’s look at the ways that we can seek validation from others, how narcissists do this also, and the results, and how to release ourselves from it. I really love this expression, ‘If we try not to upset everyone else, we will only upset ourselves.’ The Co-dependent Model of trying to please others to be loved is this: ‘If I give you enough of what you want, then you will grant me the love, approval, survival or security that will help me feel whole.’ The results of this are you are feeling emptied out, taken advantage of and not respected.It doesn’t bring the love, approval, survival and security you wish to achieve, and can even be a recipe for staying attached to abuse.The Narcissistic Model of this is: ‘I will tell you what you want to hear so that I continue doing what I do, or give you enough, at times, so that I can keep you hooked and manipulate you for my own agenda.’ The results of this are abuse, power plays, unhealthy dependencies and control.The solution is to heal ourselves enough so that we can live aligned with our true values.Or, you may believe that you have to tell them about your accomplishments.Maybe you believe that you need to be intellectual, stimulating, mesmerising or funny for people to like you.

It also means addressing the compulsion inside you to fix and give to unhealthy others in order to be loved.

Melanie Tonia Evans is an international narcissistic abuse recovery expert.

She is an author, radio host, and founder of Quanta Freedom Healing and The Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program.

And, like all our inner emotional fractures, this can be our normal as it is for most people.

We have all grown up in a world of trying to feel whole from the outside in, rather than knowing how to generate our self-fullness from the inside out.

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If you were made to feel invisible when you were young, you may believe that you must be ‘exceptional’ in order to be seen and valued by others.

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