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I was on the boat celebrating my birthday when a storm tossed me overboard and she—being a mermaid and all—rescued me and took me to shore. If you’re not dedicated to presenting great pictures, then don’t bother with online dating. There are all sorts of reasons not to lie on your profile other than “lying is wrong,” but the biggest is pretty obvious: . Russian author Anton Chekhov once wrote, “Don’t tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass.” Maybe you learned this writerly advice in high school English literature class and—like with algebra and chemistry—you thought to yourself, Don’t tell me you’re passionate about life; show me how you strive to “live deep and suck out all the marrow of life.” Little did your high-school-self know that you’d one day be writing an online dating profile, and the common adage “show, don’t tell” would be so important. Things like: You don’t have to break the ice completely, but you can ensure the ice is paper thin!
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